How to let go of the past.- By Johnny Roman

We all wish to have a future where all of our dreams have come true. Better health, financial security, peace in the family, are some of the things we aspire to. However, many of us will not attain them unless we do something that is very critical: letting go of the past.

Easier said than done you might say. It is very true that relinquishing old feelings about your past is not an easy task. If you make the committment to make peace with your past, your life and outlook for the future will change almost overnight. Lets consider some of the immediate benefits.

One terrific benefit of letting go of the past, is the freedom emotionally to move forward and embrace new opportunities. For example, if you have been divorced for several years but have been reluctant to date again, your inability to move past that event is preventing you from meeting new people who could end up providing you with new memories and satisfaction. Whoever's fault it was, clinging to the sorrows of the past are hampering your efforts at reaching prosperity. Therefore, when you decide that you will no longer let your past define you, you will approach the new opportunities in front of you with enthusiasm and fearlessness.

How to do it is the challenge. If you were the victim of a traumatic event or a crime, it cannot be stressed enough that seeking professional assistance via therapy is essential. Many victims of violent crime or sexual abuse, have encountered many hardships as they have tried to cope with the pressures of daily living. There is no shame in reaching out for comfort and direction. In a case of traumatic events like the ones mentioned, reading psychology or self-help books is not sufficient. I commend you for not letting those injustices stifle your desire to move forward and reach your potential.

For those of you still harboring bitterness from a lost friendship or conflict with a relative, forgiveness is favorable for you and them. If you dont wish to do this in person, its okay. You can write a letter without rehashing the factors that led to the rupture in the relationship. Be positive and dont assign blame. Rather, just let the person know that you dont harbor any ill will towards them, but simply want to move on with your life. They will respect you more, and that emotional baggage will finally have been discarded.

If the person who grieved you is no longer in your life and have no contact with you, you can still let go of the matter without speaking to them. Write down in a letter to yourself, that you will no longer allow that person or event to continue hurting you. Write down the reasons why it is advantageous for you to close that chapter of your life, and store that letter in a safe place where you can always read it if the old feelings of hurt resurface.

If whats ailing you are regrets, bad decisions, or behaviors that caused harm to yourself and others, you also must learn to forgive yourself and be objective. If there was a great opportunity that you rejected, or someone that you lost before you had a chance to show appreciation for; its time to move on. We are all imperfect and make mistakes. If you have made changes in your life, and worked hard at redemption, then you must stop condemning yourself for mistakes in the past. Redemption and progress continues for the rest of our lives, and we cannot let events from the past shape our future. It may be necessary to discontinue associating with people who keep constantly reminding you of your negative past, because their unhealthy influence will continue to harm you.

Another factor that will help you in your journey to growth and renewal is prayer. We all have a spiritual need that needs to be nourished, and heartfelt prayer to God is an important component. While the faith of people differ, the comfort derived from sincere prayer is indisputable. Be certain to act in harmony with your prayers, so that your confidence can grow when you see you are making progress in letting go of your past.

While there are many other detailed things we can do to make peace with our past, the key is to keep focused on your desires for the future and follow your action plan to achieve it. As each day and month passes by while you stay busy working toward your goals, you will notice that the pains from your past will hurt you less and less. You will gradually feel an emotional liberation that your past can no longer stifle you. It is that moment of jubilation that is difficult to put into words, that you will know that you have arrived in your emotional paradise with many more joys and achievements to follow!

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